A 3-Part Guide

I saw one of my favorite mentors last night. We met in 1993. Our visit prompted me to try to reflect on the significant impact that mentors can have on one’s life. To be honest, when I began my career, I had no idea what a mentor really was and how important mentorship can be. Reconnecting later in my career and beginning to mentor others has clarified how important mentors can be. I have also begun to consider some current day misconceptions about mentors.

In three parts, I plan to address Mentorship.

Part 1: What is a Mentor?

Part 2: How to Identify a Mentor

Part 3: Managing the Mentor Relationship

As always, I welcome your feedback and insights.

Part 1: What is a Mentor?

Confusion prevails over a mentor’s role. A mentor is NOT a sponsor. Mentors advise while Sponsors advocate:

A mentor is a more experienced person who is willing to provide guidance, advice, and support which helps you to grow personally and professionally. These relationships can be very informal and, hopefully, last a long time.
A sponsor is a senior leader who advocates for and promotes your career advancement, often putting their own reputation on the line. Sponsors can use their influence to open doors to new opportunities, advocate for your for promotion, inclusion in high-visibility projects, or roles that can advance their career. Sponsorship is a more formal relationship and, in my opinion, one that must be earned not assigned.

Mentors offer mentees honest advice and counsel. Mentors help navigate tricky situations. Mentors can pick a mentee up when they are down but can also convey the advice one doesn’t want to hear. Mentors do not advocate for their mentees and for their advancement. That role falls to a manager or a sponsor.

Mentors don’t need to be in your same industry, and they don’t need to look like you. As an investment banker in the 1990s, there were virtually no women in senior roles to mentor me. The few senior women in banking were pressured to work twice as hard as the comparable man, so had little time to mentor.

Two of my early career mentors were male lawyers who worked with bankers a lot. They understood my role, but didn’t work at my firm. They also had professional wives slightly older than me, so could understand my challenges. They were delighted to offer me advice and a safe space to discuss my challenges. While not in your industry or company, mentors should understand your industry and its players broadly. For example, I would be hard pressed to mentor a young doctor, because I don’t understand the challenges and politics of medicine.

Similarly, when our family friends, both accomplished doctors, had a son looking to enter banking, he turned to me for mentoring. However, some job functions have relevance across industries, Sales, for example. A rising salesperson might benefit from the sage advice of someone in tech sales despite trying to sell a healthcare or industrial product. The motions are similar.

As you consider mentors, think broadly -- mentors may come from family, your social circle, a club or organization you volunteer with.....